Saturday, March 3, 2012
this house is gross!
why didn't I notice that the house was in shambles until Saturday? Maybe because this is the first full day that Joe (my husband) will be home. All of a sudden everything is YUCK. The mirrors need to be wiped down. The fridge looks like a crime scene. The counter top is crowded with tuperware that was washed and dried but never put away. The living room floor in peppered with magazines, old mail and stray shoes. So I made a list and asked that he go through a handle the things on it...and instead, he made an omelet and went to the gym. Clearly today will be a lesson in releasing control. I want to get out of this bed and just windex until my arm is tired!
Friday, March 2, 2012
Does it Make Sense to Read Other People's Stories?
Remember when those "Chicken Soup" books started to come out? Meant to inspire and motivate, blah blah blah. Well the web is crowded with stories of future mommies who have been in the same spot as me and have come through like champs. And then of course there are the horror stories. Terrible, saddening, maddening stories of unexplained loss and the deep depression that follows. Should I be preparing for both? Even as I type that, I know I need to stay positive, especially since this is DAY 3. Clearly I am not a natural at bed rest!
Thursday, March 1, 2012
Maybe I Should Let You Get to Know Me...
I thought I'd start a list of things "about me" that might help you to put a personality with the blog. Maybe I'll add on from time to time...seems like I'll be in this bed for awhile, so why not?!?
1. I was born on a Tuesday night, October 19, 1982.
2. I only mention it being a Tuesday because I love the old poem: Mondays child is fair of face, Tuesdays child is full of grace, Wednesdays child is full of woe, Thursdays child has far to go, Fridays child is loving and giving, Saturdays child works hard for his living, And the child that is born on the Sabbath day, Is bonny and blithe, and good and gay.
3. I am the oldest of four children.
4. My dad owns a wholesale produce business, which means I never ate canned veggies as a kid.
5. My mom stayed at home with us for a long time, but now she owns a florist.
6. I went to catholic school for 21 years: grammar school, high school, college and law school.
7. I never went to pre-school.
8. My parents followed me on my first school trip with binoculars to make sure I “didn’t get stolen.”
9. My sister Rachel is a hair dresser and has done all sorts of amazing hair related projects, like the Vera Wang bridal fashion show and ad work for magazines. Now she works for this fantastic french product and gives us samples.
10. My sister Katie was on the Amazing Race.
11. My brother Michael is a professional soccer player, for the Seattle Sounders.
12. Normally being a lawyer sounds impressive, but I think my siblings do much more interesting things than I do.
13. My husband does something with finance. I don’t really understand what goes on during his day and wish he was more into office gossip.
14. I met my husband through a mutual friend at a bar, when his friend was trying to hook up with my sister.
15. I knew my future sister in law for years before I ever met my husband. I also knew my future mother in law!
16. About 3 years before I met my husband, I was actually hanging out with his little sister and her best friend (from high school), who is also my sister’s best friend (from grammar school), and I said “I think I’ll marry your brother someday.” Sight unseen!
17. I got married on November 28, 2008.
18. I met my husband about 2 weeks before my birthday in 2006.
19. We only dated for 11 months before he popped the question.
20. My husband asked me to marry him in my bedroom (at my parents house). I was wearing stretch pants and a long sleeved kids size yellow polo shirt from Brooks Brothers. I had just come home from the gym. Considering my outfit, the fact that we dated for less than a year, and how scared he looked, I thought that (a) someone died or (b) he was breaking up with me.
21. My husband and I always knew we wanted to live by the beach. Now we are about 1.5 miles from the ocean.
22. I am a certified yoga instructor.
23. My favorite yoga pose is “half moon.”
24. I was in a Kodak commercial when I was 6 years old.
25. I idolized Madonna when I was younger.
26. My friends and I used to put on a show every summer called the “Juke Box Jam.”
27. I was in the National Honors Society and the Latin Honors Society in High School.
28. I never eat asparagus and I try to stay away from zucchini too.
29. I could eat sushi 5 days a week. I even like unagi.
30. I never met my one grandmother-my dad’s mom. She passed away before my parents got married.
31. I like coming up with potential hobbies, but cannot wrap my mind around starting most of them. Like knitting.
1. I was born on a Tuesday night, October 19, 1982.
2. I only mention it being a Tuesday because I love the old poem: Mondays child is fair of face, Tuesdays child is full of grace, Wednesdays child is full of woe, Thursdays child has far to go, Fridays child is loving and giving, Saturdays child works hard for his living, And the child that is born on the Sabbath day, Is bonny and blithe, and good and gay.
3. I am the oldest of four children.
4. My dad owns a wholesale produce business, which means I never ate canned veggies as a kid.
5. My mom stayed at home with us for a long time, but now she owns a florist.
6. I went to catholic school for 21 years: grammar school, high school, college and law school.
7. I never went to pre-school.
8. My parents followed me on my first school trip with binoculars to make sure I “didn’t get stolen.”
9. My sister Rachel is a hair dresser and has done all sorts of amazing hair related projects, like the Vera Wang bridal fashion show and ad work for magazines. Now she works for this fantastic french product and gives us samples.
10. My sister Katie was on the Amazing Race.
11. My brother Michael is a professional soccer player, for the Seattle Sounders.
12. Normally being a lawyer sounds impressive, but I think my siblings do much more interesting things than I do.
13. My husband does something with finance. I don’t really understand what goes on during his day and wish he was more into office gossip.
14. I met my husband through a mutual friend at a bar, when his friend was trying to hook up with my sister.
15. I knew my future sister in law for years before I ever met my husband. I also knew my future mother in law!
16. About 3 years before I met my husband, I was actually hanging out with his little sister and her best friend (from high school), who is also my sister’s best friend (from grammar school), and I said “I think I’ll marry your brother someday.” Sight unseen!
17. I got married on November 28, 2008.
18. I met my husband about 2 weeks before my birthday in 2006.
19. We only dated for 11 months before he popped the question.
20. My husband asked me to marry him in my bedroom (at my parents house). I was wearing stretch pants and a long sleeved kids size yellow polo shirt from Brooks Brothers. I had just come home from the gym. Considering my outfit, the fact that we dated for less than a year, and how scared he looked, I thought that (a) someone died or (b) he was breaking up with me.
21. My husband and I always knew we wanted to live by the beach. Now we are about 1.5 miles from the ocean.
22. I am a certified yoga instructor.
23. My favorite yoga pose is “half moon.”
24. I was in a Kodak commercial when I was 6 years old.
25. I idolized Madonna when I was younger.
26. My friends and I used to put on a show every summer called the “Juke Box Jam.”
27. I was in the National Honors Society and the Latin Honors Society in High School.
28. I never eat asparagus and I try to stay away from zucchini too.
29. I could eat sushi 5 days a week. I even like unagi.
30. I never met my one grandmother-my dad’s mom. She passed away before my parents got married.
31. I like coming up with potential hobbies, but cannot wrap my mind around starting most of them. Like knitting.
Is this real?
I have been in bed since Tuesday evening with no idea or indication as to when I will be leaving it. When we found out we were having twins, I was much more excited than nervous. I had no doubt that I could do it and do it well–and work as an attorney, practice yoga and teach yoga at the same time. Why not, right?
And for 21 weeks and 6 days it seemed like I was right. Minus my head cold and my inability to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time, I felt like a prenatal rockstar. I didn’t even feel that “big” and was loving the positivity from friends and family about how great I looked.
So I walk into the perinatal office expecting more of the same. Everything looks great, right on schedule, babies are growing...so go home, don’t push yourself too hard, eat right, etc. and then I would share a conspiratorial smile with the sonogram technician, both of us understanding that I was going to keep up my routine until the end.
Not the case. I knew there was something wrong as she measured my cervical lining. I saw the numbers were out of the threes and I have stalked enough blogs to know that isn’t how this is supposed to go this early on. And then, right as we were finishing up, I was told that I was scheduled to speak with the doctor. Except, no I wasn’t. The conversation had clearly just been penciled in based on what the technician saw. I got dressed and walked slowly out into the waiting room, remembering to smile and thank her at least twice (21 years of private school education taught me to NEVER let good manners go).
10 minutes and one segment of NJ 12 News later (why do they always have that channel on??), I was sitting in the doctor’s cluttered office, looking at beautiful portraits of his 3 healthy children and wife. He delivered the news just as you’d expect–professional, calm, detached in a caring way. My cervix shortened from a 3 to a 2 in 10 days and that was cause enough for concern to put me on “precautionary bedrest” for a week, take me out of work, and send me over to the hospital for an hour of monitoring to make sure I wasn’t contracting.
Sort of embarrassing to have graduated law school and have absolutely no idea as to whether I was having contractions, but that’s my ego talking. Anyway-I wasn’t. No contractions. And the cute little nurse at the hospital, who had twins of her own, couldn’t be more encouraging, swearing she wouldn’t see me again until 37 weeks and promising this happens all the time.
But really, does this happen all the time? I know I am not the first person to ever be put on bedrest, but I definitely feel like I am completely alone.
The only person I told on day 1 was my husband, who I called from the waiting room before speaking to the doctor–to prepare him for the news that I knew was coming–and then on my way to the hospital. At that point, I was acting sort of “tough guy” about it all, telling him to finish out the day at work.
Day 2, I called my mom. My mother is the ultimate “Google MD” and has the unique ability to become completely obsessed with other people’s medical maladies. Before the internet, she actually used her very own medical textbook to diagnose everything from fever sores to lyme disease (seriously, I think she figured out that my sister had lyme before the doctors did. They thought it was cerebral meningitis.) She got choked up, but I think my mom was prepared for this. She thinks I push myself too hard anyway, and knows I am not exactly built to carry multiple babies.
My mom immediately put herself on bed rest as well and spent the remainder of the morning researching every person who has ever found themselves in my situation. This calmed her nerves...wish it worked on mine. She also passed the phone to my dad so I could tell him. Giving him the news made me cry then and just thinking about it makes me cry now. He hates to see any of his four children in pain-emotional or physical. I guess all dads are like that to some degree, but mine is truly a protector. So far he has offered to buy an adult size wagon so I can lay down while he pulls me around outside. He also wants me to move home, of course, since he and my mom are around a lot and work close to home. If I keep crying every hour on the hour, I may take him up on the offer.
I have been in bed since Tuesday evening with no idea or indication as to when I will be leaving it. When we found out we were having twins, I was much more excited than nervous. I had no doubt that I could do it and do it well–and work as an attorney, practice yoga and teach yoga at the same time. Why not, right?
And for 21 weeks and 6 days it seemed like I was right. Minus my head cold and my inability to sleep for more than 3 hours at a time, I felt like a prenatal rockstar. I didn’t even feel that “big” and was loving the positivity from friends and family about how great I looked.
So I walk into the perinatal office expecting more of the same. Everything looks great, right on schedule, babies are growing...so go home, don’t push yourself too hard, eat right, etc. and then I would share a conspiratorial smile with the sonogram technician, both of us understanding that I was going to keep up my routine until the end.
Not the case. I knew there was something wrong as she measured my cervical lining. I saw the numbers were out of the threes and I have stalked enough blogs to know that isn’t how this is supposed to go this early on. And then, right as we were finishing up, I was told that I was scheduled to speak with the doctor. Except, no I wasn’t. The conversation had clearly just been penciled in based on what the technician saw. I got dressed and walked slowly out into the waiting room, remembering to smile and thank her at least twice (21 years of private school education taught me to NEVER let good manners go).
10 minutes and one segment of NJ 12 News later (why do they always have that channel on??), I was sitting in the doctor’s cluttered office, looking at beautiful portraits of his 3 healthy children and wife. He delivered the news just as you’d expect–professional, calm, detached in a caring way. My cervix shortened from a 3 to a 2 in 10 days and that was cause enough for concern to put me on “precautionary bedrest” for a week, take me out of work, and send me over to the hospital for an hour of monitoring to make sure I wasn’t contracting.
Sort of embarrassing to have graduated law school and have absolutely no idea as to whether I was having contractions, but that’s my ego talking. Anyway-I wasn’t. No contractions. And the cute little nurse at the hospital, who had twins of her own, couldn’t be more encouraging, swearing she wouldn’t see me again until 37 weeks and promising this happens all the time.
But really, does this happen all the time? I know I am not the first person to ever be put on bedrest, but I definitely feel like I am completely alone.
The only person I told on day 1 was my husband, who I called from the waiting room before speaking to the doctor–to prepare him for the news that I knew was coming–and then on my way to the hospital. At that point, I was acting sort of “tough guy” about it all, telling him to finish out the day at work.
Day 2, I called my mom. My mother is the ultimate “Google MD” and has the unique ability to become completely obsessed with other people’s medical maladies. Before the internet, she actually used her very own medical textbook to diagnose everything from fever sores to lyme disease (seriously, I think she figured out that my sister had lyme before the doctors did. They thought it was cerebral meningitis.) She got choked up, but I think my mom was prepared for this. She thinks I push myself too hard anyway, and knows I am not exactly built to carry multiple babies.
My mom immediately put herself on bed rest as well and spent the remainder of the morning researching every person who has ever found themselves in my situation. This calmed her nerves...wish it worked on mine. She also passed the phone to my dad so I could tell him. Giving him the news made me cry then and just thinking about it makes me cry now. He hates to see any of his four children in pain-emotional or physical. I guess all dads are like that to some degree, but mine is truly a protector. So far he has offered to buy an adult size wagon so I can lay down while he pulls me around outside. He also wants me to move home, of course, since he and my mom are around a lot and work close to home. If I keep crying every hour on the hour, I may take him up on the offer.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)